Just before the High Holiday morning services reach their peak, the communal emissary of prayer, the Shaliach Tzibbur, turns their focus from praying on behalf of the collective and offers aloud a brief but powerful personal prayer of yearning:
"Ochilah La'El, I put my hope in You, Dear One, that I may come into Your presence," despite the limits of speech, of my vulnerable body, of my singing voice. The prayer leader beseeches the Creator to allow them to convey the soul's stirring that it may sway the hearts of the community through the tools of song and prayer.
I put my hope in You, Dear One, That I may come into Your presence.
Grant me proper speech, that I may sing of Your strength
Amidst this gathering of our community
and utter praises describing Your deeds.
All that we can do is align our hearts; God alone can grant us eloquence of speech.
God, open my lips that my mouth may speak Your praise.
_________________
During a long period of chronic illness and pain, when I was uncertain that my body could sustain the stress of leading Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur services, this is is how I expressed the prayer of Ochilah in my own words:
Holy One, Beloved One.
As I sit here trembling,
vulnerable, scared,
preparing to open my mouth, my heart,
my soul, to stand before my sacred community as a conduit of prayer,
and feeling wholly unworthy of the task,
I pray that You grant me the softness of heart
and expansiveness of breath;
that the words and sounds
that come from within me--
from within us--
weave together so that we become
the prayers we never even knew we needed to be.
Even when my joints and muscles hurt.
Even when my heart and soul ache.
Even if my abdomen swells
so that I can hardly inhale.
Even if I can barely rise
to stand before Your Awesome presence.
I promise
that I will step into Your presence,
into the heart of community.
It is in You that I will find
the ever-renewing strength
to open myself and those who gather with me,
to express our innermost yearnings.
credits
from Abitah,
track released September 13, 2022
CREDITS:
Yosef Goldman - lead vocals
Michael Winograd - clarinet
Orel Oshrat - piano
Yankale Segal - bass, tar, synths, programming
Yoed Nir - cello
Shahar Haziza - drums, percussion
Eitan Kantor - violin
A composer, prayer leader and rabbi, Yosef writes sacred music for heart opening and healing, weaving rich tapestries out of
the threads of his Mizrahi and Ashkenazi ancestry.
His songs are sung at synagogues, schools, and camps across the country.
A sought-after vocalist, and harmony specialist Yosef performs and records with a wide range of Jewish artists. ...more
It is rich in women's energy, deeply felt sounds of womb energy. A beautiful expression of the best of women in the Jewish hera-tage! Chana Raskin moves my soul, an Irish soul have I! Morgana Morgaine mollymaven
